Turning Into Blue

jumper: wasteland, top: forever 21, belt & shoes: thrifted, hat: target
Do you ever feel like you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel? Like you're just living day-to-day, trying to keep up? Feeling overwhelmed? Maybe it's because I'm in my junior year (hardest year?) of highschool, or maybe it's because I'm a teenager and emotional (true), but everything seems to be over my head. I'm just feeling overly pressured (even though I know I'm doing fine over all...) and full of doubts and confusions.

Let me just return back to spring break for a second. My guy friend Lijah and I toured 6 colleges in SoCal in a matter of 4 days, and went to Disneyland in one of them. I learned so much about colleges that I honestly didn't know before hand. It was a great learning experience and I'm glad I went with them. But that's not to say I know what my future is going to be now. Though I feel like I have a bit more of an understanding of what college is like in general... I still don't know where I want to go or what I want to do. It's a dilemma of course.

Leading me to where I am now... Going back to school yesterday was kind of a punch to the face in full force. Though, there was good and bad. The good: remember by AP Junior Research Paper I was doing? On American attitudes toward death? Yeah. I got 248/250. I was/am beyond pumped and so thrilled. Just so, so proud. However, the bad: my AP English final is this week, for some reason. I suppose it's because AP testing is coming up in less than a month...so they wanted to get the final out of the way. (oh yeah, that's another thing... AP testing...just adding on to the stress...) the other bad: I failed yet another pre calculus test. :( Sighhhh.

So as you can see, I'm a little anxious these days. I fully apologize for my lack of posting as well as commenting (despite the fact that you all are commenting and being as amazing as ever) I may be posting less, as I'm finding it hard to get the motivation to take outfit posts for some reason. I'm really hoping it doesn't last, because I adore blogging and I adore you all. Thanks for putting up with me. ♥ I'll talk to you all soon! x
currently listening to... Gretchen Parlato - Within Me


  1. Oh man, I can certainly sympathize with you! Last year was incredibly stressful at this time - finals, AP tests, pressure to find a college and what I want to do with my life, etc.

    Incidentally, this year isn't much better. Instead of having to prepare myself for four AP tests, I have to decide where I want to go for college. And I'm not satisfied with any of my options.

    So seriously, what you're doing is great! I really wish I visited more colleges during my junior year or at least broadened which type of school I would have liked to attend.

    Good luck with your finals!


  2. adorable blue dress, and the hat is so cute!

    <3 steffy
    Steffys Pros and Cons

  3. You really have a lot on your plate right now, and I'm sure all of your readers understand. You don't want to get burned out on blogging, school, and everything else.

    On another note, you look fantastic in this outfit. I love that denim dress with the lace blouse. So chic!

  4. I went through a similar experience as you are going through now. Trust me, this little time off with be much less stress for you. I promise inspiration will come, and it may come from unlikely places. Focus on your future without losing sight of your present. And relax, everything will turn out how it's supposed to.

    Good luck! :)

  5. Hang in there girl. You will figure it all out eventually, and even if you don't, you'll be fine :) i promise. one of my favorite quotes is "however long the night, the dawn will break"...something to always keep in mind through the toughest of times, <3

  6. Elanor, everything that you just said, I completely feel the same way. Exactly. It's like I go in waves, I start stressing about doing well in high school and then preparing to choose the perfect college. Then I get so stressed and kind of just want to forget about it all. Then because I'm trying to forget about it and ignore it, I begin to stress again. It's just a never ending cycle. You are not alone though, not at all.

    If we lived a tad bit closer, I would invite you to go get cupcakes with me. Cupcakes heal everything, right? Sending you ((hugs)) ♥ Michelle

  7. I'm in my junior year too. Taking AP classes, ACTs, stressing out. All that jazz. I know how you feel...and it's pretty rough. But there are good things coming up! For one, Summer's almost here :) It's really just a final little (big) push. And even judging by this post alone, I feel like you're a very smart person and that you'll do just fine. I'm about ready to jump off a bridge, but we're almost there. I hope you feel better.

    On another note, this is a lovely, lovely outfit :)

  8. couple of things i want to say:
    1. you are beautiful!! love this outfit~!!!
    2. sometimes a break is good, burning out just brings more anxiety
    3. wherever you go, you are just going to do great. <3


  9. Aww dear..hpe u gt ur inspiration back coz u hav grt style..kp it coming:-)
    adore tis dress so much,the jumper is so cute.
    Love much,

  10. I one hundred percent can relate to the first paragraph of this post. School is super stressful, but summer will be here soon enough :)
    Anyway, I LOVE this outfit! That chambray dress looks so cute with that lacey white top layered under it!

  11. We totally understand if you have to take a little break. School IS stressful! Right now I'm in the middle of working on all my finals and end of term papers (which are 10 pages each). Maybe we should all take a break, ha :D

  12. Just remember you dont have to go back to school right after high school! How are you supposed to know at 17 what you want to do forever. I was accepted to collages right after high school but I didn't go. I went traveling and worked and had fun with friends. Then I went back to school when I knew what I wanted. There is no rush! You have your whole life to figure it out and it will probably take that long! haha


  13. Congrats on the amazing score and sorry to hear about the darn calculus. Hang in there :)

    Looking gorgeous btw

  14. I graduated in '09 and I'm still lost with what do to with my life. Don't worry about knowing right now, you still have time to decide and just make sure to follow your heart. I'm sorry school is over-whelming, but hey! High five for your amazing score on your research paper.

    Now, on to your outfit. Is your jumper denim? I love it! and your shoes are pretty kick-ass.

    Xoxo Mama wolf

  15. gorgeous as always, love the pinafore and cute hat

  16. Beautiful photos and writing!! As well as your styling, girl! I have recently graduated from college and am really struggling with the next step. I decided to study journalism, but now, four years later, I don't know if that was the best choice.

    Remember that the future can be whatever you choose it to be. You can influence and change it. Nothing is set in stone, and all your hard work will pay off. I know it is stressful and overwhelming, and it will be for awhile. Welcome to adulthood, eh? :) But just imagine yourself in 20-30 years and looking back on this time...

    I don't have good advice now because I have two disgusting, farting French bulldogs by my side, but please contact me if you ever need to talk/rant/advice <333

  17. What a lot of kind, thoughtful and encouraging comments from your friends! Always remember... YOU ARE BLESSED!! Keep up the great work and maintain a positive attitude - all my love... your mom <3 <3

  18. Oh wow, very pretty!
    I love your dress
    Well done on your paper! :)


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